I live very well, missing my ex.
No sane person recognizes this, right?Missing someone is awful. It is exhausting. It is lonely and painful. It deprives you of happiness and alienates from what you want.
And yet many of us do it.
Something ends, and we refuse to go on. We cry out all the tears. We are changing the way of life. We are trying to do everything as it should to forget and start a new life, but still cling to the memories.We use this pain as an excuse to not try anything with someone else.
We get used to missing people. We live with this thought and protect them.
When you choose this pain - to miss someone, this is your form of pain. You cause it to yourself, even unconsciously.
You reject potential love because you cannot imagine a new relationship, a new intimacy. You hide because you tell yourself that your wounds have not healed yet.You use it as an excuse to give up everything that scares you.. Because while you are rejecting the world, and not vice versa, it seems that you are keeping everything under control.
And it seems that it is easier to miss someone who has left, than to think about something real and vital. It is easier to suffer for someone than to take real action. It is easier to live with a broken heart than to trust someone again. After all, the beginning of a new relationship is inevitably associated with new risks, and you are not so brave.
Safer at home, in your head with memories and longing. Because you close all the windows and stay there.
But at what stage in the process do we decide to go out?
We can stay there indefinitely, losing all the chances and opportunities, because we still do not feel ready to start all over again. But we must understand that in doing so we are doing ourselves a disservice. We no longer suffer from pain and a broken heart. We have already gone on the mend. And now we just protect our hearts from fear.
The truth is that we may never feel that we are fully ready to start over.It may seem strange and awkward to start dating again. And there will always be risks, but this is the first thing to take if we want to move on.
Nothing bad happens outside the walls of our armored heart, but nothing good happens there either.
The best - the brightest, bold, incredible and exciting that can make us move on - is beyond the walls that we built around the heart.
And at a certain point we understand that we must destroy them for our own sake. Go beyond these walls. Try again, even if terribly scary.
Because there is no future if you live inside the weary and broken remnants of the past. But there is a huge future beyond them. And as soon as we are ready to go out, it will meet us.